runouw.com

This girl makes some great lyrical covers

"But...but..." the young man protested. "All those stories about magic and monsters...they're not true, right? They're just fairy tales."

The old man sighed. "Yes," he admitted, "but they're good fairy tales."

for reviving this thread

It is currently 2:18AM

Fan is on, all windows are open, and it is still ridiculously hot.

I have accepted my fate and am ready for the sweet release of death.

EDIT: 4am and there's goddamn lightning. And there are birds singing. wtf

That sounds like the kind of setting for a horror game geez

So yesterday, a thing happened.

There's this girl I've liked for years. Even though I knew she didn't see me the same way, I couldn't let go of my feelings for her. There was a part of me that was clinging to the small hope that she might one day change her mind.

Then last night, it came out that she's started dating someone else. The news shocked me, and I ended up lashing out at her and the other person. Needless to say, I didn't get much sleep last night.

But I'm okay now. I've been thinking about it, and I've come to the conclusion that it may actually be a good thing. These past years I've been trying to get over her, only to start liking her again after I thought I had moved on. Now that she's actually with someone else, maybe I can finally stop thinking about her.

I don't hold this against either of them. In fact, I'm happy for them, and we're all still friends. I'm not going to say it doesn't hurt, because that would be a lie. But if he makes her happy, then that's all that matters.

All I can hope is that eventually, someone else will come along for me. Perhaps they'll be even better.

Until then, I'll have to make do with my waifu.

Found a tiger bee fly in my window. It is very loud from the other side. 0_o

sad days, a game I was composing music for was deprioritized in work because the platform it was made for (steam VR) isn't doing very well in the market

that and I hope I wasn't dragging them down, but eh :s

I'm worried my mental health may be deteriorating. The way I'm feeling right now is disgusting. I can't even type out what's on my mind without panicking. Has my depression reached a peak?

Three things that I hope may be the roots to my behavior:

1. I cringe at almost everything I come up with as I hack Bomberman 64: The Second Attack. I never get any criticism for anything I do. I mean, I don't quite feel intelligent just because I'm finding all this stuff, but nobody tells me what I'm doing wrong. Like, is my terminology actually bad? I don't know, so I cringe even more. And the more I cringe, the more I need to insult myself.

2. I am given zero criticism on my Hot Shot Golf: Out of Bounds videos either. Not a single like or dislike as been justified nor given any mention. I'm never told whether or not I'm technically creating spam nor does anybody really comment. The only thing I have to gauge my reputation by is looking at my views, but that doesn't even make a real difference. I mean, I like re-watching my videos from time to time, and I'm sure others would think that's why they're higher. No matter what it is I have uploaded, I'm always expecting a dislike before playing it.

3. I haven't touched my Wii U in nearly a year. This is because I am highly uncomfortable starting it up just to see any of my Super Mario Maker levels deleted. In fact, I completely avoid the Bookmark altogether. Not only that, but I have had several mental outbursts over speed-runners taking up WRs. The last thing I ever touched before abandoning my Wii U was a battle for the WR on some level with the word "Quilt" in it, and I couldn't keep up with the absolute precision that NStar possessed.

I don't mean to rain on your parade, but

I used to be a Teeworlds speedrunner, a bit like what you do now.

Sure, there's plenty of times you feel accomplished by the skills you've built up, but after a while, it's little more than a sugar rush. Taking it too seriously got me more stress and a collection of faulty mice than these high scores could ever make up for.

Now, I don't regret ever playing in the first place - I regret getting carried away so often. There's quite a few people I still come across in there every few months, and play a few "casual" matches with. But it's already a far better place to hang out in than the speedrunning community ever was.

Try taking a break and slowing down a bit as well.