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I don't how to describe it very well, but I've been depressed over the past couple of years.

I've been too shy of talking to people, specifically asking someone out. I've doubted myself: doubted that I would do well no matter what test, or event it was. I've been afraid of trying because I thought what was the point if I didn't know what would happen. I've been afraid of failure, and hated myself for failing and couldn't move on from it. I never gave any of my successes another thought; they just moved on from my life. So that's been going on.

I've also stopped caring about myself and the world. I've been empty-hearted. I've felt like I've lost all hope for myself. My reality is basically warped.

I know this sounds weird because I was a happy guy back then, but I've changed.I wish I could be as happy and tranquil as I was back then. I don't know if I can ever change again to be positive again. I've tried, but I get brought back down again.

I've also been looking at other people's accomplishments. I see my peers at school with a car and a date. In art, I see better drawings than what I have, and it somewhat discourages me.

I've been struggling to study. I can't concentrate on reading a chapter of a textbook once or twice a week. It bores me. I don't learn a lot from it. I fail because of it, but I can't seem to find alternative routes; and I feel like giving up.

All in all, I have been struggling to return to the positive and I have been depressed. And I've had a lack of faith in myself. I don't know why this is happening to me. I made pretty good SM63 levels when I was on here back then, so why am I not taking those accomplishments into consideration and having a happy and healthy lifestyle because of it? I don't know.

This may sound weird or it's worded weird. I understand. As someone with Asperger's, communicating is by far the hardest thing I can ever do.

EDIT: The major issue now is trying to keep going when I feel like I have absolutely no willpower left.

I'm sorry to hear. I personally recently went into a couple of years where I too struggled a lot, and only a week ago I got out of that mode.

I too am pretty awful at starting conversations, let alone talking to people. But hey, with all that proper grammar you're smarter than a good 70% of the people I know, both in real life and in the internet.

Who says you have to have a girlfriend to be successful? There's a good chance I myself will go on forever without having a lover. I guess if it is important for you there's always the opportunity to just learn how to get good at whatever it is crucial to do it.

I can't blame you for getting bored at textbooks. Any good teacher would know not to rely purely, or even mostly on students studying from a textbook, then coming back with pages of homework. I too got so tired of textbooks and the general high-school life that it was such a huge relief then I got out of it. (Unless you're in college and the teacher is making you do most of your work from the textbook. Then that's the sign of a pretty bad teacher.)

... Well, if you need to vent more, I'm willing to listen. And so is everyone else here.

And welcome back. :>

DarkBlaze wrote:I've also been looking at other people's accomplishments. I see my peers at school with a car and a date. In art, I see better drawings than what I have, and it somewhat discourages me.

I do this a lot too, but I'm learning to try and sidestep it. I've been told I have very little self-confidence, but nonetheless, I still keep at what I do, and I reckon you should do the same. Eventually, you'll get out of this phase. Don't focus on what others have achieved, focus on what you have and what you want to do.

When I do something, and I see impressive results from somebody else (let's take a piece of art, for example), I try not to think "I'm never gonna be as good as them". Instead, I look at what they've done and how they've done it, then I learn from that. So if someone's drawn a fantastic drawing of, let's say, a bird, I see how they've gone about drawing it and I learn from it.

I won't say a lot because sometimes I think being concise can be better than being overly detailed. But the world has 7 billion people in it, in that 7 billion, there's always going to be someone better or worse than you. So comparing yourself is only going to hurt you and no-one else. Be an individual and be proud of what you have achieved. People in my classes at school left with A-A* grades and I didn't, but I know I did what I was personally capable of and that made me happy.

Also, high-five, I have Asperger's too. It is a pain in the ♥♥♥ when it wants to be but you can also make it a gift. Let me tell you now, ASD is the only condition I have that comes with a lot of legit perks, so I say use them! People like us can pick up skills very quick when they find something they're deeply interested in. I'm sure there's something out there for you.

Asperger's can be a blessing, and I ought to consider the good aspects that have come out of it rather than dwell on the drawbacks of it.

DarkBlaze wrote:I see my peers at school with a car and a date.

Ah, you northamericans and your teenage driver's licenses and proms...

Stupid introduction and late arrival aside, here's the deal. It's something that at some point we all have to deal with.

You'll always run into people who seem successful. Who seem to have many accomplishments. However, you cannot use them to measure yourself.

If you want to be a better person, it must be for yourself. If you want to do something, you just go out there and do it. It's better to dare than to be left wondering "what if?". People who are successful are people who do things. And if you fail, you gain experience, you grow wiser. You regroup, and you try again. But along the way, you may decide you don't want to do this anymore. Circumstances are ever changing, interests might be different.

Talk to other people. Listen to their stories, ask about their perspectives. In this world communication is important, and getting to know other people can also help you know yourself. And you can always count on your family or friends to help you. And even if you feel the whole world's turned its back on you, there will always be someone willing to be there for you.

People learn differently. Try to investigate about different methods of studying, and see if you can apply any of them to yourself. Try to figure out how do you learn, what's the best way for you to absorb knowledge.

If you're sad, cry. Feel the grief. There's no need to pretend to be invincible. It's better to let your emotions out than letting them build up inside you.

If you like a girl, just go for it. Worst thing that can happen is her saying no. If she turns you down, there's millions of other girls out there.

You're usually better than you think you are.





















It's nice to see you again around these parts, my fellow Dark one.

All of that is really good advice. Thank you.

NanTheDark wrote:You're usually better than you think you are.

Yep. Just today I ran in a 5K. There were SOOO many people I thought I was going to get a slower time than my record. Nope, I set another record for myself. I completely underestimate myself at times when I shouldn't.

NanTheDark wrote:It's nice to see you again around these parts, my fellow Dark one.

Nice to see you too.

DarkBlaze wrote:All of that is really good advice. Thank you.

I'm glad to hear you found my advice helpful

Remember, we're always here for you if you want to talk or whatever.

And keep running. It's very good exercise. Increases your stamina and stuff. (incredibly technical terminology)

Dude, if you can run a 5k you're already better than most people.

Raz wrote:Dude, if you can run a 5k you're already better than most people.

Haha. I'll keep that in mind