Something serious happened to me a couple of days ago.

[WickedOreo]

A couple days ago, Sunday to be exact, I ended up having something terrible happen to me. If you're not comfortable with stuff that might be triggering or sensitive, I would suggest not reading what is in spoiler tags.

So, after a long night of work, I walked home with a male coworker who doesn't speak much English. Since his house isn't out of the way of mine, I was comfortable enough to walk to his house. Well, unbeknownst to me, I was going to be sexually assaulted by him.

If you're wondering, yes, I am physically okay. Mentally, I am still recovering. I'm still really detached about the whole event, but I asked to take the rest of the week off from work in order to get myself in working order again. I talked to my close friends and work about the incident, and reported it to the police, but I didn't want to press charges because I am a firm believer in second chances. He will be keeping his job at work because it happened off the clock, but my GM assured me that I wouldn't be placed in the same shift as him.

I won't suggest reading below if you aren't capable of mature subjects, but I need to get this off of my chest, so I do apologize if this is too graphical. Let me know if I need to edit it out or otherwise.

Spoiler: show

I was forced to perform fellatio on my coworker at his house. When I went over, we went up to his room since the living room was occupied, and the only place to sit was in his room. So, he used Google Translate to ask me questions, specifically if I wanted to perform fellatio on him. I said that I wasn't comfortable with doing anything of the sort, and said no, and then tried to guilt trip me into doing so, all the while he went into the bathroom to disrobe himself waist down. Eventually, he forces me to do the deed, but I cannot handle it, and so I gag and almost cannot breathe. During this time, I'm paralyzed mentally. I cannot think, and all I can muster is going into a ball and crying, speaking broken phrases, saying no multiple times, and he's trying to kiss me, touch me, and I don't know what to do. I want to go home, but I'm scared. He's a boxer, and I don't want to be hurt. After a half hour of him trying to... get off, he ends up doing the deed on my face. We talk philosophy concerning his religion (he's Christian, supposedly), and finally, a couple hours after the whole ordeal, I get some sense to go home and sleep. He wanted me to keep the whole thing a secret, but I cannot possibly do that. I confided with my close friend Erik and told work and made a statement to police, but that's pretty much all I can do since it only got so far as oral sex.

The whole situation was terrible. It made me much more dependent on human contact, and even would prefer to be around a trusted individual at all times. I can still walk to downtown, no problem, but it's difficult to be alone, since my depression flares up. I've spoken to Shad, Darth, and Doram about this whole situation, and I thank the lot of them for being supportive and talking to me throughout this.

[Charcoal]

Dang. I have never been in a situation like that, so I don't know if I would have good enough knowledge to know what to say for advice.
And I too am still recovering from my own depression and anger.

I guess try to focus on the good things about you maybe? Maybe that'll help with recovery.

But dear God, that is serious. This isn't the only time I've heard people being raped or sexually assaulted, but hearing it from a member on here just seems different.
If I can think about it, I can pray for you if that helps any.

EDIT: Or I should I have heard of these cases before, but I never really understood the emotions of someone who has experienced it.

[Bogdan]

This post by Bogdan was thumbed up by:

Harmless (January 1st, 2016, 11:59 am)

[NanTheDark]

I'm glad you actually spoke about it, at least.

But you should have pressed charges.

...

Dammit I hate seeing stuff like this, it makes me want to be there and beat up people >_< If I had been there, I would have put his so called boxing to the test, that ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ how dares he, what kind of man does that, is he sick in the head? Seriously, what the hell man? You just don't do that, just don't, dammit I'm... outraged...

...dammit...

Just... stay safe, ok? Be more careful in the future. And learn some self defense, if this happens again I want you to break that f&%$er, alright? Alright.

...

DAMMIT

[Charcoal]

Dammit I hate seeing stuff like this, it makes me want to be there and beat up people >_< If I had been there, I would have put his so called boxing to the test, that ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ how dares he, what kind of man does that, is he sick in the head? Seriously, what the hell man? You just don't do that, just don't, dammit I'm... outraged...

...dammit...

DAMMIT

Note to self: Do not piss off Nan.

But yeah, I agree with that. Why would people do that when it's totally wrong or if they know it's wrong but do it anyway?

[NanTheDark]

They have something in the head. Seriously. Or they just don't care. People who do bad things often know it's a bad thing. Or at least, that it could get them punished. But eh. I guess they value other things more for some reason.

Also yeah. Might not be the best idea to piss me off.

[Kimonio]

I can't say much past what I have in private chat, but feel welcome to approach Doram, Darth, or I about law if necessary. I can also give you the links to resources, such as RAINN, if ever needed.

Breathe, Nan. Breathe.

[MessengerOfDreams]

I say let Oreo process her trauma her way. You've given me the same privilege with my cancer. I'm not gonna claim to say I understand anything, obvs, and I don't know what I agree with and I don't, but the fact of the matter is that this is her situation. Hopefully you can focus on what's most important- making yourself better, in the way you can trust yourself to.

[NanTheDark]

Yeah, Oreo seems to be dealing with this pretty well. She's gonna be alright.

[~MP3 Amplifier~]

I am sorry Oreo that you were put through this. If you ever need to talk...I'm here...let's just say I can understand on some level.
I'm glad you've already spoken to others too and so so relieved you're going to report it. You deserve so much better than this.