runouw.com

So I go in and launch SM53 from newgrounds, and I find this review that looks unusually long and ranty, I was right.
It rated SM63 as a 5/10, which is weird, so I went on and read the whole thing. The surprising thing is, some of the things said was true.

Jobro, or someone else. wrote:"It seems every review for this game as well as several posts on the front page praises this game which is clearly the best game ever made. What makes them immediately say this? I downloaded the .swf and extensively played this game just to see what all the fuss was about, maybe for a few hours, just trying to get Shine Sprites and Star Coins.

Then I realized I simply was not having fun.

Some of the features of true Mario games were changed in such a way that was entirely unnecessary in this game (such as Metal Mario being vulnerable to attacks). Features like the FLUDD and the Wing Cap were made fairly well, but they also had some issues. Sometimes, if you're in a level with a FLUDD and you die someplace, you return to the same area and you still have the water pump with you. Other times, it's suddenly gone from your back and there's no getting it again. Then there are those stars that give you invincibility, invisibility, the Wing Cap, along with the Silver Stars that can get you Shine Sprites. All of these stars look exactly the same. There's almost no way of knowing what you're getting next, which of course helps a WHOLE lot in the slapped-together level designs. Most of the levels are just a barrage of platforms that move in circles, followed by enemies that are so ridiculously inconveniently placed, you MUST get hurt before continuing a part of the stage--no option. There are "secrets" all through the castle that for the most part you just have to find by accident, and they just lead to more shoddily-designed levels. You can't possibly expect someone to get half of those Star Coins without Mario committing suicide in the process seeing as they're usually at the bottom of death cliffs.

There are too many glitches in this game for me to even name, and some of them I can't even tell if they were really 'intended' to be viewed as glitches or not. Any time I lose some life, I find myself collecting coins and nothing happens. It's like there's a certain number of coins, or maybe a time limit, before you can refill any of your health. I had to restart the beginning of the game multiple times because one of the flying Goonies was randomly placed directly underneath Mario, which moved him aside and ended up freezing Mario's movements completely, since it wasn't intended for him to move until he went to read the first sign. I also experienced a crazy glitch on the first Bowser where he got thrown BACKWARDS into a spike-bomb and his 'hurt' sequence looped off the edge of the screen over and over. I had to kill poor Mario to continue. Then there is a level with an invisibility star that does not end. I couldn't tell if that was supposed to happen or not, but it took a very long time to beat the level. Musical fanfares such as those when you exit a painting or activate some switch don't always stop the music playing in the background, which makes all the sound clash together.

Another thing that irks me is the storyline twist after the second Bowser battle. It's enough to have a cliche "the whole world will be destroyed by an item of power", but you even made up some out-of-place Japanese thing CALLED "The Orb of Power," and of course everything will be destroyed except Bowser's castle, which has a happy force field around it. Bowser is not the type to destroy an entire universe. He'd take it over like he tried to do in Super Mario Galaxy.

Other things, like the techno Bowser stage music, the total lack of clarity in the way things are explained, the many problems with the basic controls, how much the World Maps don't help, the 4chan memes and references mentioned by all the Toads in a game that's already a giant parody... I could go on and on simply with the 13 Shine Sprites I obtained. But I seem to be running out of room for much more of a rant.

So, why do so many people like this game?

This game is big. It has Mario in it. He can triple jump. But everything else is a jumbled mess. This game could have been infinitely better.

People think this is a useless review."

everything is almost similar to the real game.boring

Even though I love SM53 with an undying spirit (Okay, maybe putting it a bit too far), some of these things are right, no matter how you look at it.
What do you make of it?

Well... Yeah, of course what he says is true. He's the type of person who can't deal with anything wrong he sees. OCD? People are like that, and yes, it is something that others notice but never complain. These people are critics, yes, they see the bad things in games and such. I don't think this guy is a GOOD critic, because he 1. Never finished the game, and 2. Already had his mind chosen from even before he started the game.

Um…he has some good points. But what really makes this game so amazing is not the little details. 1. It's the simply unbelievable graphics. 2. It's the massiveness of the game and the excellent gameplay. 3. So what if there are glitches? I'd rather have a good game with glitches than a bad one without.

And some of those things are just BS. All the stars look exactly the same? If that's what you think, then you're blind. And "shoddy level designs?" That's just crap.

marioiscool254 wrote: All the stars look exactly the same? If that's what you think, then you're blind.

Colorblind you mean. Or both.... o_0

To be honest, now I find the game boring. I've completed it at least 3 times from when Runouw reloaded it, and now its just 'urgh'. Although the Level Designer is still up there, that's probably the only part I don't find boring now.

Same here. I'm guessing the part where "Bowser wouldn't destroy the universe" would make more sense to him if he finished the game. Another guy said, "Good thing to do while loading" and gave it a 0.

Why would a critic say that about a great fangame that was in development for like, 2 or 3 years?

Okay, let's BREAK IT DOWN!(MC hammer music plays)

Some of the features of true Mario games were changed in such a way that was entirely unnecessary in this game (such as Metal Mario being vulnerable to attacks).=Thats like ONE THING, and it makes no sense in-game.

Features like the FLUDD and the Wing Cap were made fairly well, but they also had some issues. Sometimes, if you're in a level with a FLUDD and you die someplace, you return to the same area and you still have the water pump with you. Other times, it's suddenly gone from your back and there's no getting it again.=This guy has a cr*ppy computer or something.

Then there are those stars that give you invincibility, invisibility, the Wing Cap, along with the Silver Stars that can get you Shine Sprites. All of these stars look exactly the same. There's almost no way of knowing what you're getting next, which of course helps a WHOLE lot in the slapped-together level designs.=He MUST be colorblind.

Most of the levels are just a barrage of platforms that move in circles, followed by enemies that are so ridiculously inconveniently placed, you MUST get hurt before continuing a part of the stage--no option.=Well, every level in every game has platforms- Hurr Durr!

There are "secrets" all through the castle that for the most part you just have to find by accident, and they just lead to more shoddily-designed levels.=There IS skill in finding these!

You can't possibly expect someone to get half of those Star Coins without Mario committing suicide in the process seeing as they're usually at the bottom of death cliffs.=True... But you do have fludd.

There are too many glitches in this game for me to even name, and some of them I can't even tell if they were really 'intended' to be viewed as glitches or not.=Again, every game has glitches.

Any time I lose some life, I find myself collecting coins and nothing happens. It's like there's a certain number of coins, or maybe a time limit, before you can refill any of your health.=He wasn't paying attention in the part where it explained how to refill health.

I had to restart the beginning of the game multiple times because one of the flying Goonies was randomly placed directly underneath Mario, which moved him aside and ended up freezing Mario's movements completely, since it wasn't intended for him to move until he went to read the first sign.=He has the worst luck in the world.

I also experienced a crazy glitch on the first Bowser where he got thrown BACKWARDS into a spike-bomb and his 'hurt' sequence looped off the edge of the screen over and over. I had to kill poor Mario to continue.=This happened to me too, but it was fixed in the next update. Again, bad comp.

Then there is a level with an invisibility star that does not end. I couldn't tell if that was supposed to happen or not, but it took a very long time to beat the level. Musical fanfares such as those when you exit a painting or activate some switch don't always stop the music playing in the background, which makes all the sound clash together.=Runouw mentioned about this, so this guy should be prepared for it.

Another thing that irks me is the storyline twist after the second Bowser battle. It's enough to have a cliche "the whole world will be destroyed by an item of power", but you even made up some out-of-place Japanese thing CALLED "The Orb of Power," and of course everything will be destroyed except Bowser's castle, which has a happy force field around it. Bowser is not the type to destroy an entire universe. He'd take it over like he tried to do in Super Mario Galaxy.=Just didn't finish the game.

Other things, like the techno Bowser stage music, the total lack of clarity in the way things are explained, the many problems with the basic controls, how much the World Maps don't help, the 4chan memes and references mentioned by all the Toads in a game that's already a giant parody... I could go on and on simply with the 13 Shine Sprites I obtained. But I seem to be running out of room for much more of a rant.=What lack of clarity?

So that's my review of a review.

The thing with this guy's review, is that he goes and mentions all the bad things. If he were to pile up all the goods against the bads, maybe he'd realize how much of a great game it actually is. Sure, if you play it three times over, it can get boring, but same goes for any other game, with a few exceptions.

Yeah. What Niklaw said.

This guy obviously doesn't like Mario games, and he fails to recognize how much work has been put in the game. If he were to just take a moment and stop to look at the graphics....but no. He has to go rushing through the game, pointing out every little thing, just for an excuse to make a long, boring review of how lame this game is. This game isn't perfect, true, but they're games. EVERY game has faults, no matter how you look at it. So I could always take SSBB and right me a review like this:

blablob wrote:SSBB
1/10

SSBB. I don't see why people love this game. The SSE sucks, the Level Designer could work better, a lot of characters suck, the FS's are too random; it sucks.

Now, starting off with the characters. What is so great about them? Did anybody actually care about Lucas? Why did they get rid of Mewtwo? And who the Heck is Iceclimbers? It would've been better to make a few really good characters instead of a lot of bad ones.

And the online multi-player sucks as well. Lag, sometimes an inability to get a connection. It's like they're asking for you NOT to connect online.

And the stage builder. It is WAY too random. And it sucks. Sometimes my friends come over and build an impossible stage, and then we play it, just so everyone can die. What fun is that?

Also, some of the FS's are good, but too many of them just SUCK! I mean, what's up with Luigi doing ballet? And why are a lot of the FS's the same, such as Lucas and Ness? Or Fox, Wolf, or that other guy nobody cares about? They should've been unique.

We also have the SSE, which has a lame storyline. Oh: "The world's gonna get sucked up if you don't stop a mysterious villain." Yeah. Real original, guys.

So in conclusion, I just don't see what people like about this game. I played this game for a few hours before I got bored with it, and I've never played it since. It just seems like there's more bad then good.

In other words, it's a piece of crap.

Yeah. Like that. Now, obviously, I don't mean any of that, since I love SSBB. But this is how this guy is acting. (Oh, and BTW, I have nothing against Falco. He just seems less popular than the other 2.)

I lol'ed about your fake review.