Towels

[Venexis]

So. As a declaration of my faith in His Most Honourable Fluffiness, the softest towel-resembling deity in all the heavens, I have made this game. Its purpose is simple, to alert people to the obvious benefits of carrying a towel at all times by highlighting the everyday situations in which a towel could come to the rescue. Next, the rules. One person makes up a situation, and the next poster must solve it using ONLY a single towel and the items described in the situation. For example:

A freak meteor tears through your flight, totally annihilating your plane. Because you're a man of the world, having seen many things and experienced critical danger multiple times throughout your travels, you consider safety precautions such as seatbelts below you, and refuse to have yours buckled in the secure position recommended by nine out of ten travel agents in event of a freak meteor eviscerating the better part of your flight. Stupidity aside, the fact remains that you were bodily flung from your seat and out through the space the cockpit of the plane should've occupied, and begin falling at an alarming rate. The remainder of the plane explodes above you, and now Mr. Man of the World is plummeting to certain doom. What do you do?

Pull out your trusty towel, firmly grasp an end in either hand above your head, and float gently back down to solid ground upon thermal updrafts. All praise to the Towel Lord!

The second poster would then make up a situation of his/her own, and so the game would continue. Obviously the situations don't need to be so descriptive, or so flashy. I'll start.

You're being chased by a bull, a clearly enraged bull. You can't remember precisely what you did to anger it, but it's not about to give you time to remember. It starts chasing you, horns gleaming, and you know you'll need to pull some hardcore towel trickery to escape alive. What will you do?

[brandoprojectm]

Rape it.

And use the towel as a condom.

[Asterocrat]

You forgot something, Brando

Anyway.

Global Economical Crisis. Money is leaving the banks faster than the speed of light without stopping, and if you don't do anything, the global economy will fall, probably leading to a World War to get the last money left on the planet. Luckily, you have a fluffy blue-and-white-striped 100% cotton towel, so you can still save the economy.
What do you do?

[Megar]

Steal all the money using the towel as a basket, then allow it to rain the money.
Free money for everyone
Situation:
You're having a heart attack. You still have your towel, though.

[brandoprojectm]

u 4got sumthing brundo hurr

>implying that was a serious reply

But what the heck.

Use the towel to hang myself and avoid the pain of dying by heart attack for the non-pain of my neck being instantly broken by the combined forces of both gravity and my own weight.


You are being raped. What do.

[*Emelia K. Fletcher]

Use a towel to -REDACTED-, while simultaneously -REDACTED- for the purpose of -REDACTED-.

You are stuck in hyperspace, with an infinite improbability. You have your trustworthy towel, though, what do you do?

[TheMMMification]

Use the towel to create a trusty hyperspace helmet, by wrapping it around your head, leaving a slit for your eyes, and pretending that it's a trusty hyperspace helmet. I can then find a way out of hyperspace now that I can comprehend it with my trusty hyperspace helmet.

You're in a duel. Your opponent has a gun. All you have is your trusty towel.

[Megar]

*whip* *sexual cries* The End.

BOMBS, YOH WANT IT?
you are stuck in CD-I world. Le towel is there to helps.

[Raz]

Hmm

[Harmless]

... Fine, I'll answer.

BOMBS, YOH WANT IT?
you are stuck in CD-I world. Le towel is there to helps.

Use the towel to safely arrange the inside code into a certain binary code to help you escape. Not telling what the code was though.

You are skateboarding (even if you don't, deal with it) and then, out of nowhere, KevinOC comes in and makes you fall. A giant explosion comes along then and makes you fly high into the sky. Then you get caught by an eagle, put into the eagle's nest, and then get attacked by the eagle and it's babies.

All you have is your trusty, 100% cotton, durable towel. Wat do.