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The Dream pt 1

PostPosted: June 30th, 2016, 2:57 am
by AreaxisFromMC
The Dream pt 1
Heyooo guys!! Yup its me the creator of War of the stars series! I stopped doing it cuz i had exam and i forgot to start it up again.. so sorry :( Anyway i started a new series. I always liked to make creative stories
in sm63 and it seems so fun to see your comments in the forum xD so please share me ur opinions for this level! That is all! Now lets get to the main topic: Mario has been having strange nightmares lately and he wants to find out why is it happening to him... Help him in his adventure to find the secret of his nightmares! this is the first part so enjoy! :D


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Re: The Dream pt 1

PostPosted: June 30th, 2016, 6:12 am
by DualFreezor07
No need to apology for being absent, we all have lives to live and making a level takes time and dedication, so it's completely understandable. Just for example, I haven't been active from the beginning of this year until this month and I'm still in the process of making a level slowly but surely. So welcome back. Even though I've never played your War of the Star series nor have I seen much of you in the forums, but then again I'm pretty new and infrequent member of Runouw :P . Now as a fellow sm63 level designer I definitely agree that it's interesting and fun to see people's thoughts and idea on whatever the heck I've come up with.

Now, as for your level. I like the recreation of classic Mario level layout in the level, though I'm not sure what purpose does it serve yet. And since this is the first part of a series, you would have to excuse me for bringing in the literature talk: I feel the level is too short, more specifically, the level did not create enough tension, or interesting story line to hook the player in. Why is the person in prison important? Who is the wizard and why is the wizard important? It's a bit interesting to know but the viewers probably don't care at this point. Of course, nothing is really wrong with what you are doing but I'm just emphasizing that the intro is important since it's the level that either makes player interested to play the rest of the series or leave to play some other series out of boredom. Also I feel the level get's nothing resolved, only a few questions raised, making it rather unsatisfying to play this level as a standalone, this, along with the point I've made above, makes it a good idea to extend the level a bit so we get a better idea of what sort of journey Mario is about to embark on.

Onto the level design, first the toad April Fool's trap, is there a point of having the trap there? It has nothing to do with story telling and we've been warned of it's existence so it's not cheap, it's just there so that that the classic mario level 1-1 recreation is complete... only to be cut off halfway. Another thing is, it's good and all for the recreation level section to have enemy placements exact the same as the original. But since this isn't the original mario, the sections end up being too easy and bland. Although the section with the trick jump on the mushrooms to avoid fake shine spirits is pretty decent. (I think you misspelled shine spirit as "sun spirite")

So in conclusion, this is a rather "meh" level. Nothing too interesting, I'll give it 3 out of 5. Since I do see effort and attempt at story telling. But don't be discouraged, I tried to be constructive in critiquing so you can improve.



TL;DR version: exam? no worries. Story/level 2 short. Too easy, add more stuff. meh, 3/5.

Re: The Dream pt 1

PostPosted: June 30th, 2016, 6:43 am
by AreaxisFromMC
DualFreezor07 wrote:No need to apology for being absent, we all have lives to live and making a level takes time and dedication, so it's completely understandable. Just for example, I haven't been active from the beginning of this year until this month and I'm still in the process of making a level slowly but surely. So welcome back. Even though I've never played your War of the Star series nor have I seen much of you in the forums, but then again I'm pretty new and infrequent member of Runouw :P . Now as a fellow sm63 level designer I definitely agree that it's interesting and fun to see people's thoughts and idea on whatever the heck I've come up with.

Now, as for your level. I like the recreation of classic Mario level layout in the level, though I'm not sure what purpose does it serve yet. And since this is the first part of a series, you would have to excuse me for bringing in the literature talk: I feel the level is too short, more specifically, the level did not create enough tension, or interesting story line to hook the player in. Why is the person in prison important? Who is the wizard and why is the wizard important? It's a bit interesting to know but the viewers probably don't care at this point. Of course, nothing is really wrong with what you are doing but I'm just emphasizing that the intro is important since it's the level that either makes player interested to play the rest of the series or leave to play some other series out of boredom. Also I feel the level get's nothing resolved, only a few questions raised, making it rather unsatisfying to play this level as a standalone, this, along with the point I've made above, makes it a good idea to extend the level a bit so we get a better idea of what sort of journey Mario is about to embark on.

Onto the level design, first the toad April Fool's trap, is there a point of having the trap there? It has nothing to do with story telling and we've been warned of it's existence so it's not cheap, it's just there so that that the classic mario level 1-1 recreation is complete... only to be cut off halfway. Another thing is, it's good and all for the recreation level section to have enemy placements exact the same as the original. But since this isn't the original mario, the sections end up being too easy and bland. Although the section with the trick jump on the mushrooms to avoid fake shine spirits is pretty decent. (I think you misspelled shine spirit as "sun spirite")

So in conclusion, this is a rather "meh" level. Nothing too interesting, I'll give it 3 out of 5. Since I do see effort and attempt at story telling. But don't be discouraged, I tried to be constructive in critiquing so you can improve.



TL;DR version: exam? no worries. Story/level 2 short. Too easy, add more stuff. meh, 3/5.


I can see that you didn't like the shortness of the level but I prefer to keep it that way because I am making 2 parts everyday to add up with the story. Also that april fools was just a joke, I won't feel sad that you didn't prefer it but i respect your opinion, anyways thanks for the reply and also its a sun sprite not shine spirit xD

Re: The Dream pt 1

PostPosted: June 30th, 2016, 6:52 am
by DualFreezor07
I would say pumping out 2 levels per day is too quick and likely cause the level to lack in detail, take your time to make the levels can often make the levels a lot better overall. But hey, it's your series, not mine, go nuts my friend!