Life Inside a Level - Ch. 8

[StarF]

chapteh 2 iz awesome .. wut im speakin liek you did xD

[GalaxyMario]

Cool. There should be a final chapter where you are stuck in a spam level full of bullys.

[nin10mode]

Maybe... I think I'm gonna take a break from writing for a while. I gots me some projects I need to finish.

[Ayrayen]

That's cool! I think you should continue!But I think you should be in 24murph's levels...

Naw whats wrong with ma levels? ;D
This was...special! Unique! =D
I loved everyminute of it! It was confusing sometimes. But i understood what you wanted to say! =)
The story is good a lil original with the Booom bam! but i like it
Im gonna continue read this! ^^
When you mentioned one of my levels i was happy and like ''Omg! I just gota keep on reading ''
Continue please ^^ 10/10!

[Ridder]

Well, listen to my negativeness right now.


BAD

• I don't like how when people realize something they go "OMG MODE IS STUCK IN SEID GAME HERE.", Capital letters, all of it. in a one liner.
• Suspense? Not so much on that.
• Finishing off the chapters greatly? Not so much either.
• Not really living in the level, just trying to get through it.
• Using capital WORDS too much to emphasize how they speak certain words.
• Characters don't seem too far different from chickens who realized they are about to be beheaded and skinned.
• You need some things to describe who is saying what, "That sounded wrong is SOOOOO many ways but yeah I think I can" I couldn't tell if Ayra or you were saying that.

Now you can hear the good things I have to say.

Good

I like how you didn't keep a continuous cast, meaning I like how different people control you each chapter, showing how you think of their SM63 skills.
I like how much action is going on, it isn't too little or too much to overcome the rest of the story.
Twist on the every item/tile placed turning into signs was original.
I like how you didn't realize what was going on for a while, the "three second" between it actually happening and you getting there kind of thing irks me.
The chapters are moderately sized, so you must be doing something right.
I like how you mentioned Through the fire thing.

OVERALL:7/10

Final Comment:Could be much better, but it's gooooooood chicken.

[Ayrayen]

Ohh and ps Nin10mode There is a way to complete the bongo plains . . .

Have you seen those spinning platforms on right and left side? Jump one the right platforms and you'll se what happens!

So actually you can defeat that level.

[nin10mode]

Oh well!

EDIT: I made a Story Cover out of boredom. It should be on the first page.

[Mario Levels]

you should Get 10/10

[nin10mode]

Ohh and ps Nin10mode There is a way to complete the bongo plains . . .

Have you seen those spinning platforms on right and left side? Jump one the right platforms and you'll se what happens!

So actually you can defeat that level.

I tink you mean da left one. ^^

[nin10mode]

Ohh and ps Nin10mode There is a way to complete the bongo plains . . .

Have you seen those spinning platforms on right and left side? Jump one the right platforms and you'll se what happens!

So actually you can defeat that level.

I tink you mean da left one. ^^

In other news...
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Chapter 3 is halfway done, but I'm kinda busy. Be expecting it sometime next week.