Runouw.com City
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This subforum is for forum-based stories only.
Re: Runouw.com City
by The Masked One » April 30th, 2011, 2:37 am
[Out of date]
Last edited by The Masked One on May 3rd, 2011, 1:17 am, edited 1 time in total.
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The Masked One - As Ninja As Myst
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Re: Runouw.com City
by The Masked One » May 1st, 2011, 1:58 am
~Further Notice~
Sorry about Chapter 7 Delay. CPU problems.
Sorry about Chapter 7 Delay. CPU problems.
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The Masked One - As Ninja As Myst
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Re: Runouw.com City
by The Masked One » May 1st, 2011, 4:54 am
CHAPTER 7 Complete! Its my longest (and most important) Chapter so far. Inspired by Megaboy.
You may be wondering, "Where the hell is Blab, Suyo, Runouw and the rest of the mods? Why aren't they doing anything to solve this problem?!?"
Answer: All in chapter 7. Involves a gift.
You may be wondering, "Where the hell is Blab, Suyo, Runouw and the rest of the mods? Why aren't they doing anything to solve this problem?!?"
Answer: All in chapter 7. Involves a gift.
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The Masked One - As Ninja As Myst
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Re: Runouw.com City
by Ridder » May 1st, 2011, 11:32 pm
I didn't know how to convey my feelings of the entire story in one simple short summary, so I'm going to do a chapter-by-chapter retelling of my feelings.
Introduction:
*sigh* There are a few noticeable errors, and the amount of obvious references to other stories was just.......
Chapter 1:
Oh look at that. Two paragraphs full of errors. How exciting.
Chapter 2:
I see you can't pace your stories well, and your descriptive words are all wrong. Oh. Also two paragraphs. Or three. Either way, pretty damn short.
Chapter 3:
What's the deal with your short chapters? And your grammatical errors? Blegh.
Chapter 4:
Prizon? Three quotation marks for one line of dialogue? ANOTHER SHORT CHAPTER?
I don't know if you guys think this is a masterpiece, or really awesome, but I'm here to tell you that this "story" is terrible.
Chapter 5:
No comment. At all.
Chapter 6:
Sigh. Poor storytelling again.
Chapter 7:
Great characterization of some of the most mature people here. Just greeeeeeeeeeeat.
Rating? Sure. 4/10.
Introduction:
*sigh* There are a few noticeable errors, and the amount of obvious references to other stories was just.......
Chapter 1:
Oh look at that. Two paragraphs full of errors. How exciting.
Chapter 2:
I see you can't pace your stories well, and your descriptive words are all wrong. Oh. Also two paragraphs. Or three. Either way, pretty damn short.
Chapter 3:
What's the deal with your short chapters? And your grammatical errors? Blegh.
Chapter 4:
Prizon? Three quotation marks for one line of dialogue? ANOTHER SHORT CHAPTER?
I don't know if you guys think this is a masterpiece, or really awesome, but I'm here to tell you that this "story" is terrible.
Chapter 5:
No comment. At all.
Chapter 6:
Sigh. Poor storytelling again.
Chapter 7:
Great characterization of some of the most mature people here. Just greeeeeeeeeeeat.
Rating? Sure. 4/10.
THE CREED: Nothing is True. Everything is Permitted.
"...That's rather cynical."
"It would be if it were doctrine, but it is merely an observation of the nature of reality.
To say that Nothing is True is to realize that the foundations of society are fragile, and that we must be the shephards of our own civilization.
To say that Everything is Permitted is to understand that we are the architects of our actions, and that we must live with the consequences, whether glorious...or tragic."
-Ezio Auditore da Firenze explaining the Creed, 1514, Masayaf.
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Ridder - The Legacy
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Re: Runouw.com City
by The Masked One » May 2nd, 2011, 12:37 am
Did some fixing.
Errors fixed. Refferences: Not so much.
Fixed.
I do admit, the chapters where pretty short when i started. Will try to keep them lengthy from now on.
Chapter thing from above. Gramatical errors fixed.
Prison spelling fixed. Dunno what the hell that secound part is tho. Third, yeah reffer to above. And i tries. But i failz
Erm... How the hell do i fix that? Is it good or fail?
Will try to fix in future. When i learn how to do it better.
Yeah i c y.
Anyway, yeah. Fixed version is up.
Ridder wrote:Introduction:
*sigh* There are a few noticeable errors, and the amount of obvious references to other stories was just.......
Errors fixed. Refferences: Not so much.
Chapter 1:
Oh look at that. Two paragraphs full of errors. How exciting.
Fixed.
Chapter 2:
I see you can't pace your stories well, and your descriptive words are all wrong. Oh. Also two paragraphs. Or three. Either way, pretty damn short.
I do admit, the chapters where pretty short when i started. Will try to keep them lengthy from now on.
Chapter 3:
What's the deal with your short chapters? And your grammatical errors? Blegh.
Chapter thing from above. Gramatical errors fixed.
Chapter 4:
Prizon? Three quotation marks for one line of dialogue? ANOTHER SHORT CHAPTER?
I don't know if you guys think this is a masterpiece, or really awesome, but I'm here to tell you that this "story" is terrible.
Prison spelling fixed. Dunno what the hell that secound part is tho. Third, yeah reffer to above. And i tries. But i failz
Chapter 5:
No comment. At all.
Erm... How the hell do i fix that? Is it good or fail?
Chapter 6:
Sigh. Poor storytelling again.
Will try to fix in future. When i learn how to do it better.
It was late at night and all i could think of. I couldnt just type in [Insert a few minutes of entertainment here.] Anyway, fixed. More mature. More Fancy. More "Pom pom tar pom pom pom!"Chapter 7:
Great characterization of some of the most mature people here. Just greeeeeeeeeeeat.
Rating? Sure. 4/10.
Yeah i c y.
Anyway, yeah. Fixed version is up.
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The Masked One - As Ninja As Myst
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Re: Runouw.com City
by Megar » May 2nd, 2011, 5:51 am
That was your idea on it's own.
It looks nothing like what I sent you.
But yeah, I want what happens in the end of my chapter at the least.
Pweeze?
It looks nothing like what I sent you.
But yeah, I want what happens in the end of my chapter at the least.
Pweeze?
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Re: Runouw.com City
by Ridder » May 2nd, 2011, 8:29 pm
I'm not really one for the general plot so far, but the Fixed version is very much improved. Looks like an okay story so far now.
7/10.
7/10.
THE CREED: Nothing is True. Everything is Permitted.
"...That's rather cynical."
"It would be if it were doctrine, but it is merely an observation of the nature of reality.
To say that Nothing is True is to realize that the foundations of society are fragile, and that we must be the shephards of our own civilization.
To say that Everything is Permitted is to understand that we are the architects of our actions, and that we must live with the consequences, whether glorious...or tragic."
-Ezio Auditore da Firenze explaining the Creed, 1514, Masayaf.
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Ridder - The Legacy
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Re: Runouw.com City
by The Masked One » May 2nd, 2011, 11:00 pm
Megaboy wrote:That was your idea on it's own.
It looks nothing like what I sent you.
But yeah, I want what happens in the end of my chapter at the least.
Pweeze?
I intend on putting your chapter in next (It will be unofficial though.)
And it was Inspired by you.
Also:
Ridder wrote:4/10
YEAAAAH! I GAINED 3 POINTS BYLater, Ridder wrote:7/10
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The Masked One - As Ninja As Myst
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Re: Runouw.com City
by The Masked One » May 3rd, 2011, 1:17 am
Update: Chapter 8 is up. Two versions.
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The Masked One - As Ninja As Myst
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