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Demonic

PostPosted: October 24th, 2011, 11:35 am
by MessengerOfDreams
A/N I'm not sure about this piece. Like, at all. It could be the campiest, schlocktastic piece ever, or it could be something powerful that makes a difference.

So this is about UsuarioTHf, and it takes the 'fighting inner demons' analogy to a whole new level. The demon could be whatever holds you back or haunts you- self-hatred, the words of others, anything. This is just an observation of an analogy through someone who it seems experienced it before.

Also, this story has been approved by Usuario himself, although when he read it the ending was really bad. So I guess it means he approves even more. :D

Enjoy, or give ass-kicking feedback!

MoD

Edit: Also, since you guys won't SHUT THE ♥♥♥♥ UP about it, the demoness is such a seductive tease because it's to provoke thought on how twistedly seductive it could be to pity yourself all the time instead of facing reality. Not because I was horny. I mean, if ya want someone horny, look for... any other user.


“I knew you'd be back.”

“Naturally.”

Eduardo sighed as he peered over the dock for what seemed like the millionth time since he first saw it at the age of twelve. He was wishing that his demon wasn't next to him and he was trying to pretend he didn't go out of his way to be antagonized by her.

The demoness smirked. Her red skin glowed in the noon sunlight, which had absolutely no effect on her as the stories and tales liked to dictate. Demons were nothing like people thought they were anyways. She simply enjoyed being a messenger of misery from the devil himself.

His misery.

“So glad to see you again,” she whispered in his ear.

The twenty-four year old man growled, because she was. She enjoyed his addiction to her company. He shoved away from her, letting her fall back behind him.

She giggled. “You dumb boy. You know I'm going to ruin your life. And you still came to visit me anyways.”

“Shut up.”

“Where's the fun in that?”

Another growl. Another giggle.

Eduardo glared at the outlying sea. Quite a gorgeous sight. The azure ocean was at such a blue shine that oceans rarely truly achieved. The clouds were particularly nice today, scattered around the bright sky like feathers from a frantic bird.

Her presence was always an effective euthanasia to the world's beauty.

“So what brings you here, you foolish boy?” she asked patronizingly. “To see little old me?”

“I want you to leave,” he replied angrily, trying to put force in his voice. He wasn't very successful.

“No you don't,” she smiled. “Otherwise you wouldn't have invited me over.”

“Invited?” While his voice was calm, the anger rising in it was obvious. “I never invited you in. I never wanted you in the first place.”

“Oh, Eduardo,” she smirked again. “Poor, stupid Eduardo. It's your misery that invites me in. I can't help it.” She licked her lips gratuitously and sighed. “Mmm. It's the best drug I'll ever find.”

Eduardo glared at her as she sat on the wooden railing, her legs crossed. He used to blush at her unclothed appearance, but he learned to carry on strong and never show any weakness. Just another way to taunt him.

In the end, though, he had no way to counter her. She was right.

“So, Eddy,” she smiled, getting up and leaning over his shoulder again. “What is it this time?”

“Nothing,” he stated, hiding emotion.

She burst out laughing. “Who do you think you're fooling, you stupid boy? Something's troubling you. Shall I take any guesses?”

“No!” he demanded. Instantly he realized what a mistake that was.

“Then I shall,” she smiled with fake sweetness. “For you. My Eduardo.”

Damn, he thought. It didn't matter because she could even hear him there.

She snickered and asked “Was it... that girl again?” Leaning into him, she continued. “Such a tease, that girl. One day she acts like she loves you, and the next, pop!” She raised her right hand into the sky, wrapping her left arm around him tighter. He felt a horrid suffocation, although he could breathe.

“She knows how to make you suffer,” the demoness continued. “She's so good at it. I'm almost envious of her,” here she craned her neck and planted a soft kiss on his cheek, “for so many reasons.”

“Get off of me!” Eduardo demanded, shaking vigorously.

“Oh, Ed,” she sighed in content, “you know I can't do that. You just feel so... good. So miserable.”

Eduardo shoved harder with a tortured yell, and this time the demoness left his shoulder. “Playing hard to get, Eddy?” she asked with a smirk. “Then perhaps I should tempt you with more. I bet you would like to know how this poor girl... really feels.”

“I don't want to know,” he growled, although even he knew that was a lie.

“She cares about you,” she hissed, her tones wicked and delightful. “She cares about you so much, Ed. But you confound her. You confuse her so much... she's hurt. Poor girl.”

“Liar!”

Not fazed in the slightest, she continued. “She retaliates because you hurt her so much. You break her heart, my Eddy. With your foolish games and the way you two get along. She's just like you.”

“Don't say that!” Eduardo shouted. “You're wrong! She is nothing like me!”

“She loves you.” Before he knew it, the demoness was back on his shoulder, in his ear. “And she hates you so much. I bet she's just as miserable as you!”

“Shut the ♥♥♥♥ up!” he roared, violently shoving the demoness off of him, watching her sprawl on the ground without so much as a yelp. He knew that others would be glaring at him from the shore. After all, he was the-

“You're the only one who can see me, Eddy,” she finished for him, causing him to jump back in surprise. “My Eddy. You're all mine, Eddy.” She sighed pleasurably once more. “All mine.”

Eduardo looked on in horror, watching her stand back up. “But maybe that's not it,” she smirked. “Oh, there are so many things it could be! So glorious!”

Before he could protest, she continued. “Maybe it's how much you think people undermine you. They did it when you were a kid. And even now, even as such a strapping young man, they still think you are nothing.”

Eduardo shivered at the intensity laden on the last word. “You're wrong,” he insisted. “They think very highly of me.”

She giggled. “You naïve boy, you. They simply patronize you. They don't want to see you hurt. They know, just like I do, that you're an insecure, troubled, stubborn little brat.”

“Liar!”

“They don't want you to embarrass them. That's why they keep you at a comfort zone. At ease. Do you know why no one has promoted you yet?”

“Shut up!”

“I'm having too much fun to do that, my dear Eddy. Or should I say, Usuario. Usuario, the little representative for the people who thought he could. You've had such a small position for so many years now. Almost a decade. No one's ever thought to bring you up higher. Those years greener than you shoot up to the top while you stay here, on the very first step. Pretending to be useful.

“They can't afford to have you any higher. You are weak. A fool. You'd crumble under all the pressure. Just like you did before with that Messenger fellow. And you had barely started. No wonder he has never thought to promote you.”

“You liar!” Eduardo shouted. “He's a friend!”

“A friend? You truly are clueless,” she laughed, digging her nails into his skin and sighing when he winced. “He's in a high position of power. He has to look good to everyone. He hates you, just as much as everyone does. You have no friends.”

With a loud shout, he landed a sharp punch directly into her face. She stumbled to the ground, laughing hysterically. “You think I feel that pain? Oh, how good that felt, Eduardo!”

“Shut up!”

“I tasted so much of your suffering in that act right there, oh it was delicious!” she insisted giddily. “I would so much love it if you were to do that again!”

“No,” he asserted.

“You must! Come on, once more!”

“No!”

She leapt off of the floor, her smirk gone. “Just as I thought,” she hissed. “You are weak. Incompetent. You've proved yourself to me, my Eduardo.”

“I despise you,” he seethed.

“I love that about you,” she smiled once more, facing him directly. “You make no move to remove me. To take my power. I am in your mind, I am all yours. You have given me the power. It would take so little to destroy me but you won't. You're addicted to me.”

“Never.”

“Oh, but you are,” she put her hands around his neck. “You drink me in, knowing that I am the poison, but that I am also the sweetest wine that you'll ever taste.”

“You're disgusting.”

“These sweet nothings,” she purred, wrapping one leg around him. “How they warm my heart.”

“You are nothing!” he spat.

“Oh, but I am everything to you,” she whispered seductively. “You would have destroyed me a decade ago, when you were just a kid. Or would have made me go away. Make someone make me go away. You can do that, you know, but you don't. You want me.”

“No!”

“You love me...”

“Shut up!”

“Just as much as I love you.”

Eduardo squirmed, but she pulled him closer, hissing “I am your misery, and you love my company.” And with nothing else to say, she leaned into him and kissed him, ignoring his protests.

Instantly, he forced her away, frightened. He started to run away from his monster, trying desperately to leave.

“Oh, my Eddy,” she called sweetly, “I can't wait to see you again.”

He didn't reply to her, but the simple statement cut the last little bit through his heart. He ran until he could no more, and then he collapsed, not noticing where he was.

This has to stop, he thought bitterly as the tears began to fall.

“I knew you'd be back.”

“Naturally.”

He stood on the docks again as a storm crept up, trying to keep his composure. She smiled, relishing the moment. “Oh, Eddy, how I enjoyed our last visit. It's been much too long, so try not to leave early this time, my dear.”

“Quiet,” he commanded.

“You never learn, do you, Ed?” she giggled as she started her advance on him. “You've still stuck to your old games, even though they've never worked.”

As she wrapped an arm around him, he smirked. “Nope. This time I'm finally trying a new game.”

“Oh?”

Before she could move further, Eduardo shifted his hand and then forced it forward, colliding with the demoness' torso. She gasped, looking down towards her stomach to see a silver knife plunged into it.

To Eduardo's surprise, she laughed. He tried to hide any trace of horror; he'd need to more than ever.

“Oh, Eddy? You want me gone?”she asked mockingly, observing the knife. “You foolish boy, don't you know you're doing it all wrong?”

Effortlessly, she turned towards him, the knife falling through her frame as if it was nothing but air. She giggled as it clattered against the ground. “You see, Ed, you can't get me away from you. Nevertheless, it was a nice try. But you're still just as weak as ever.”

Eduardo sighed, leaving the knife be. His brain was fast at work, although things looked to be at its worst. As he suspected, she was already smirking in anticipation.

He came across an idea. An idea he had thought of before but did not have the courage to pull off.

It was about time he did.

“So how miserable is your life this time?” she asked.

“It's actually going pretty good,” he countered.

“Lies,” she hissed. Eduardo noted that she still looked amused, but a hint of surprise flashed in her eyes.

“Actually, it's the truth. I talked with Messenger. Just a nice cup of coffee. You weren't even on my mind.”

“That's such a lie, you daft boy,” she insisted, trying to hold control.

“You'd like to think so, wouldn't you,” he replied, his words condescending just like hers. “We had a few laughs and talked things over. He's a very genuine guy; my god, you wouldn't believe the language he uses for a government official.”

“Such a miscreant he is, then,” the demoness insisted. “What poor company you do keep, they shall ruin you further.”

Eduardo glanced at her, at first defensive of his friend, but then he realized the demoness' smile had faded. He continued on. “He also did mention that he wanted to promote me a bit higher when he got the chance. Said that he knew I had it in me, but he wanted to make sure I was ready before he did.”

“Mm?” she raised an eyebrow, turning towards him. “You think you'll get any higher? How can you when you're still torturing yourself with me?”

“I don't think you understand, my demoness,” he smirked, putting a hand under her chin. “I am here today because I am earning my promotion.”

He could sense a hint of fear in her eyes. “You still have such a torrid love life, though,” she declared.

“Ah, resorting to cheap insults now, aren't we? Are you running out of mindgames?” he feigned sweetness. “You seem to have lost your illusion of control.”

“You dumb boy,” she hissed angrily. “I do have the power over you. I always have, and I always will.

He ignored her, growing more confident. “About that girl, I have decided that enough is enough. I'm ending the games and breaking down the walls, and we are going to work this out without playing any further. And whichever way it goes will be the path I gladly walk down.”

“You liar. You don't have the strength to.”

“Ah, yes, strength. You always said that I lacked it. That you were stronger than me. I must, in fact, thank you for all that you've done for me.”

“Thank me?!” her eyes turned black as she shrieked.

“Yes, of course, my dear,” he stated as he stroked her hand in his. “I appreciate what you've done, because you showed me how low I was, and gave me the strength to push up higher. You gave me the control, and all I had to do was take it.” He leaned towards her so that she could feel the power of his words breathe onto her.

“Just like you told me I should... my love.”

Before she could counter, he had kissed her gently on the forehead, and then shoved her away. She fell on the ground, horrible, sharp noises echoing around the docks where the two sound. Eduardo ignored all the frightening sounds and picked up his knife one last time.

“You are nothing without me!” she shrieked standing on her feet.

He laughed loudly as he prepared his knife. “I created you. You would be nothing without me. And now...”

At that moment, he struck her with the knife one last time, in the chest. It implanted itself through her body and then, before he knew it, she had vanished.

“...you are nothing.”

Eduardo sighed, collapsing onto the dock's planks. His back rested against a wooden pole, and the knife clattered on the ground, not a drop of blood on the blade. The demoness constructed out of an aura of negativity prominent in his mind was now gone. For good.

“Now I have the power,” he murmured to no one in particular.

And it was a start.

Re: Demonic

PostPosted: October 24th, 2011, 3:50 pm
by RedLink
IT SUCKED!!!..............................





























Naw.... But Here is my Review.

1) I can't accept that Usu acts this way. It's just not him. I don't know, after talking with him for 1 year...doesn't work with me.
2) You focus too much on how the demoness loves making Usu miserable and Usu just insulting her. It got boring after 20 lines of the same thing. "YOU FOOL" "LAWL STFU"... But that's just me.
3) It was really short and could have been lengthen WAAAY more than this.
4) Nothing else except Usu just being all like >:( and the demoness being all like >:). I don't know...just got too repetitive. Could of made this Story's idea better in many ways...I know you... You could of :D
5) Ending was all like da fu... I mean, it was expected *Only way to make her go away is to get strength and move on*. Not a really big OMG Did not see that coming ending... Again, maybe just me. :<

So yeah...That is all for now. The description and characters were good but not perfect. Still good.

8.5/10 :D

Re: Demonic

PostPosted: October 25th, 2011, 4:55 pm
by Killswitch
That is one of the best ways to counter your enemies :twisted: , the demoness won at first, but Usu killed her at the last :twisted: . Congrats to Usu and MoD (For writing this)! :D

Rating: 8.7/10