Beautiful Imperfection

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Beautiful Imperfection

Postby MessengerOfDreams » May 24th, 2011, 7:13 pm

A/N- This may or may not be dedicated to someone who means the world to me. Hehe...

If I walked up to you, and I told you that you were not perfect, how would you react? Would you become angry at me? Would your face twist up with the hurt of my words, each one a sharp stab to your skin that burrows through to your brain and only torments it more? Would you simply brush me off and disregard everything I said, shoving it back into the closet of your subconscious next to your skeletons?

Because, the truth of the matter is, I do not think you are perfect.

And I do not want you to be.

So please stop trying.

You can deny it if you wish, but I doubt you will. You make it known that your brilliant singing voice is mediocre at best. That your gorgeous blond locks hide that inspired, thoughtful mind you think is tripe and dull. I once called you a butterfly, for you were intelligent, unique and graceful in a way no one else is. You only offhandedly commented that it would be a miracle if you were even close.

And you say that you're working to become perfect at long last. It sorrows me to think that you are not satisfied with yourself. When I hear you speak dreamily of finally being 'good enough' like it's the Aurora Borealis, I feel a part of me crumble. Because I think you're good enough. To say the least.

You say that you don't mind when people spread rumors about you, because you say the only way to stop them is to achieve perfection, but I hear them, and it takes all of my strength not to snap the neck of whoever started them, damn the fact that I may never have met them. You do not deserve the hateful things others say about you, not at all, even if you are not perfect.

Perfection annoys me. First of all, it's nowhere near obtainable. It simply cannot come to pass. We were not created to be perfect, for whatever reason. The more you force yourself to be perfect, the more you force yourself to be something that you are not, and you take away from yourself. And you as yourself are simply amazing, and I do not want to lose that.

But imagine it for a second.

What if you were perfect?

You would be exactly what you tried to make yourself. You will do everything right, you will look perfect, and you will have everything you wanted at your fingertips.

But if you simply just have it, then what's the point?

Life is like a game. You learn your path, you learn how to traverse it, how to work towards whatever goal you have in mind, with your brains, your strength, your connections, your support, your wisdom, all of which are things you yourself have, my dear.

Perfection is like a game already completely cleared. You know every path, you can grab every coin without even trying. You can practically walk to the finish line with your eyes closed. You can play the game, but for what? Hasn't it already been cleared for you?

Soon, you will realize that perfection will turn into nothingness, like immortality. You will crave adventure, excitement, to learn, to be challenged, but you will not be able to because you can simply complete the challenges with the blink of an eye. And then you will become empty. A porcelain statue, smooth and beautiful on the outside, but inside, nothing but air, invisible molecules bouncing around in an empty porcelain cell. Nothing going nowhere.

It is like the book that St. John had eaten in the midst of his revelation- sweet as honey in its taste, but violent in the pain it causes inside.

Now imagine, dare imagine, if you and I were both perfect.

It is similar to the concept of heaven, and one of the reasons I dislike it so. We have had everything done for us, and all that's left is to eat strawberries in the Garden of Eden. In truth, however, we are still as empty, because we have not traveled together. We have not faced the challenges of life, we have not learned about each other, and we have not created the bond that the both of us facing the world would create between us. We would simply be. Hollow, alone right next to each other. Facing a mirror image of ourselves and not a person we truly knew.

But what if I were imperfect, and you perfect? We both get what we wanted?

I would be able to learn through my life as so desired, and would face the aforementioned trials and struggles, and the bonds with others, the reaching of goals on my own two feet. But you would not. You would simply stand there, watching.

Would you start to resent me, that I would be doing all of this? In theory, you would be perfect so you'd be too good to hate me, but in all honesty, I would resent you. I would resent that you had it made so you did not have to do anything to get what you wanted, while I'm out here pouring blood, sweat, and tears into my goals and dreams. I would hate that you did not wish to go through the trouble yourself or even try but would still be declared better than I.

Because in all truth, what makes us good is what we learn and accomplish as imperfects.

But should things remain the same, which I pray they will, and we are both imperfect people, then life will truly be a joy to live. Without perfection, we fall prey to tragedies, to struggles, to pain, to anger, but while they are never good to experience, they leave us stronger, better than we were before. And we will experience them together. We will help each other climb up the mountain. I'll help you up if you fall, keep us steady, make sure we make it to the top. We'll truly become better people than we are now. We won't become perfect.

We'll be better than that.

The way life works is that we work to achieve our goals, and then we do it again. But each time, it's always different. New lessons, new people, new goals. But it never gets to be a broken loop; it's always different. A cycle. The universe works in cycles. The earth's rotation cycle, the moon cycle, the life cycle. Perfection is not a cycle. It's a straight line, like a flat heartbeat.

It's a living death of the soul.

And you are not perfect. While your voice is beautiful, occasionally you use it for insulting yourself way too much. You worry about how what you do affects everyone; even if they have had nothing to do with you, you still worry you've hurt them. And despite your superior intellect, you worry that you're not good enough. Yet you are. There are many other small things that you may not be good at or have trouble with, but we all do, and I want you to accept that. Embrace that. You and I may not have known each other since birth, or even for a large number of years, but what we've done together will forever have an impact on my life.

I don't mean to sound like I'm preaching. I'm honestly not.

I'm just desperate to keep you.

You.

Not the Stepford version of you.

Not even the supermodel version of you.

You. As you are.

The best part of you

what composes your beauty

is imperfection.


And I mean that. I made that for you. Because I mean that. I hope you'll listen.

So... I've made my case. I hope you'll hear me. My friend, my ally. One of the most important people in my life. And that you'll understand. I don't mean to put my rose-colored glasses on you. I just simply want to snapshot what I see of you in them. And... it's better than any rose I could see in it.

Thanks for reading this. Whatever you do from here on is up to you. Don't be afraid to approach me when you're done. Even if it's just to talk with me like normal. So I can at least see that confident smile on your face again.

Always, forever, love

Me.

A/N

This... this was raw. I don't know how it seemed to you, but it was to me. Because I meant it. Because to me, this is real.

I battled whether or not to even post this here. I didn't think to until I started to talk about climbing, actually, and even then I wasn't sure if it was good enough, or if I was comfortable with it. I don't mean to beg for reviews, so I won't. But if you are kind enough to leave one, know that it is more meaningful to me than most other reviews; I'm not undermining the other wonderful reviews and reviewers. I'm simply saying feedback will help my soul along with this. I'm not even sure if I'll send this to my friend (don't ask, it's highly personal) but I might.

God... I sound like Youtube thumbs-up desperate sob story comment. Hoopenblargh. (Yay for MalusCalibur reference I'll be the only one to ever get out of all of us here. XD)

I also like how I'm a dude doing this. I know people say that women get a lot of stereotypes against them, and it is horridly true. I do think, to a lesser extent, that men get a few sneaky ones as well, but I can say us guys are more thoughtful and emotional than we seem, and not just sausage fests. That you ladies really mean a lot to us. ;) And not just on those annoying Facebook Like pages.

Whew... whoo-wee. Blargh. I should stop before I barf out my whole soul and every thought on my mind. I'm getting pretty emotional. :P

But, yeah. Here's a piece of my soul for ya. Hope it made a difference.

For your fellowship
No matter what road I write on
Makes all the diff'rence.


I wrote that for you all. l meant it, too.

Thanks.

MoD
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Re: Beautiful Imperfection

Postby MessengerOfDreams » May 25th, 2011, 11:20 am

I'm not one to post again in my own topic... but this review I got from another site really... took my breath away, and, yes, made me cry.

Araceli L wrote:...Oh...my.

I'm trembling. I can't help it.

I've never read something that's made me feel this way. This is beautiful beyond any account...this is indescribable. This is worthy of the highest praise I have to offer and more. This is perfection. This is the soul poured out to script, and THIS is what writing is all about.

If there were more people like you, if there were more people dedicated to others as you've shown yourself to be here...the world would a little bit better.

This is a masterpiece of sublime perfection. I can't find a better word than perfection. You're at your most vulnerable, and this utterly, COMPLETELY dashes out every other story on this site, and it was magnificent. I've never read any story nearly this amazing. This is what love is about, and you've just captured it..and I can't even find more words.

I used to think of myself as a rather good author, as arrogant as that sounds. And now I want to write as you do.

Whoever (whomever?) the young lady is that you wrote this for, I think you should send it. And she'll be lucky to have you.

Keep it up.

~Araceli L
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My Most Recent Works: show
I switch my signature a lot. If you wanna see some of my past ones, here you go.
Silent Conversations and a Crow's Final Song!
My latest story, and one of my personal favorites. A girl bound in silence finds the words to say to her prospective girlfriend as they visit her religious father in a dusty town on the edge of Kansas, where the crows' migration south brings forth anchored memories, the path to resolution, and a new start.

Form (25quared)
This might be like nothing you've seen before.
Updated Works! Some of my past best and current stuff: show
Writing Works!
Fanfic: Shut Up and Dance
why do I write so much about dancing you don't dance you've never danced in your entire life
lying little ♥♥♥♥ with your ♥♥♥♥ story ♥♥♥♥ you
also Diddy/Lucina <3

Fanfic: Worth a Thousand Words
Because the world needed a Samus/Dedede story
Fanfic: Ecstatic Silence
Just wanted to write and ♥♥♥♥ like this happens, you'd think I'd know better.
Fanfic: Far From the Edge
It's a dance that's been a long time coming for a brand new man and an unchanging woman, but once one takes the plunge there's no falling back up.
Original: Jealous Ghosts of the Mississippi
The story of Rachel meeting Amber after a lifetime of silence and being shunned
Original: Your Hand in Mine
One of my most personal stories about a dangerous romance. Now to be published in a college lit journal!
-------------------------
Recent LDC Work:
Level Series: Leaves From The Vine (ft Star King)
For the 29th LDC, a theme of grassland taken through the growth of our designing society. Won the 29th LDC!
--
Levels at Large:
Level Topic: Collection of MoD's Levels!
If you've ever wanted to see any level I made worth a damn, go here! From the quiet 14th LDC entrant Finis to the megasmash level series Dark, you can find links here!
"You were always a revolutionary, now there's just less of a chance of you crying in the corner." ~Ridder
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Re: Beautiful Imperfection

Postby Buff_ » May 25th, 2011, 12:55 pm

'tis moving to say the least. It seems you have thought very hard about this, and the person you wrote it for should also find it very moving. At the same time though, it seems very overwhelming which could be for the better or worse depending on her character. Don't let me put you off though. She should read it, it's great. I personally liked it. It was very well written and thought provoking.






This type of writing could definitely be used in your stories, and it seems you excel at it. Moving stories are always a winner. Good on you Moy. :D
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Re: Beautiful Imperfection

Postby RedLink » May 25th, 2011, 1:45 pm

Well MOD This was yet another beautiful story er...Love Letter.
So Yeah you should TOTALLY Give it to the girl you like/love.
Anyways I give you a 10/10.
Keep on writing and stuff. You are an amazing writer.
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Re: Beautiful Imperfection

Postby NanTheDark » July 11th, 2011, 3:00 pm

...Awesome.

The word that describes it best. :awe:
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