by l.m » November 25th, 2015, 5:21 pm
Double post, but I feel like I can't handle this situation much longer. A lot of bad stuff is going on and I can't really help it but watch.
Sometimes I wish this place wouldn't be this scary. It's a really constant robbery and violence, and right when you think it's never going to happen with you or with people that you love, it suddenly happens and surprises you when you're not seeing it.
But it's so common, everyone thinks it's a normal thing, and every time when they come to see what happened after an event like this, they think it's just another insignificant case, and that it's never going to happen to them. Here, it has become a normal thing for everyone to go outside less, to look around constantly for any danger, to try to "prevent" it from happening. But most of the times it's just useless. It's just like there's a ♥♥♥♥ nigga in every corner wanting your head on a plate. And even if you manage to stay inside your house and never go out forever, they still find a way to enter, and... God knows what happens next. It's really hard to keep smiling after something like this happens.
And when you try to trust on people that is supposed to protect you - the Police - you keep waiting and waiting for a response, but nothing happens.
This is not right. It's really freaking hard - if not impossible - to live in an environment like this. An unsettling paranoia takes control of everybody, because they're all scared of what might happen. Everyone looks suspicious. Everyone IS suspicious. Everyone is really likely to come in your direction and try to stab you and grab everything you have of value afterwards.
Living alone might be a cool experience- on a safer place. The feeling is way much worse when you know there's nobody close to you who can protect you. When it happens, it happens. No mommy or daddy to call on for.
Is this just real life? *insert Bohemian Rhapsody joke here* Because if so, my view of life suddenly got really negative out of the blue (and it's ironic, because a while ago we were having a conversation about that in the chat).
Despite everything, I know it's just going to end soon. There's less than two weeks left before I just move to a better place. Not sure if it was like that all along or I just decided to open my eyes now, but I feel a constant hype and hope to see it all end. For me. It's still really disturbing that people here are going to face this situation for who knows more, and it doesn't look like it's getting better. At all.
But for now I just want it all to end for me. I really do. I don't think I was that excited for middle-December to come already in a long time.